Men are from Mars: Practical Examples from Yoga to Help Your Marriage

I know this may come as a shock, but it is not uncommon that the Mr. and I have a spat. Typically, when I get angry, he shuts up, which makes me even more angry, until several hours later when one of us freaks out and a make up is soon to come.

When I first got married I believed that if I just communicated everything all the time, non-stop that there would be no way that we would even fight, as he would always know every latent expectation of my heart. Apparently, when we first got married, he thought he would try to hide in the woodwork of every apartment until the scary parts were over. Then I think he realized two years in, I am the scary part.

The difference between the communication styles of men and women has long been the subject of silly jokes. For example, for years now, my sisters bottle of Herbal Essence reminds me every time I visit her: The average woman speaks 20,000 words a day, The average man speaks 7,000. While the credibility of facts from a shampoo bottle can be taken to task, what cannot be ignored is this: its funny because most people believe it is true.

This was typified for me today when a sub taught my normal yoga teacher's evening class. I always get nervous with male instructors, since they seem to forget how hard it is to work around a set of boobs and what it is like to only be able to do five push ups. I think this man in particular must have used 6,875 of his words for the day before coming to class because large gaps with no instruction would go by while he took postures completely unfamiliar to me. The name would escape him, and when he realized he was in another position, seemingly by accident, he would say "Uh, next, do this."

While a female yoga teacher typically circles the room and asks if any of us have injuries or sore places, hugging new people and regulars, this fella started with, "My music is different, pretty much I'm a lot like ____ but different. Go faster or slower, whatever." It was pretty evident that this man was a professional in his daily life, successful and well-kempt, and yet, every time he said something like, "Next.... this!" I couldn't help but question his sanity.

A comparison, for your enjoyment, male and female versions of instructions to enter Bridge Pose.

Female: "Vertabrae by vertabrae find yourself lying on your spine. Draw your feet into your body and give them a hug. Carefully lower your left foot, placing the sole of the foot near the buttox. Inhale. Right foot follows, exhale. Shrug your shoulders to align them and then bury them underneath you, with gentleness. Then begin to lift up your spine, starting from the hips, as if it were a string of precious pearls, one by one, feeling the rhythm as you lift yourself into your own expression of bridge pose. Respect your journey."

Male: "And, um, next.... bridge pose."

So while I am not into gender roles, per say, and I don't believe a higher power made us for certain jobs in or out of the home, etc, I will say that being there tonight after a spat with Mark helped me to comprehend a lot about our different temperaments and natural tendencies.